Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Rule #1 : Lick it Before you Stick it ......

How important is sex in your relationship?? Whenever I chill with my girls we have the most heated discussions when it comes to sex and relationships, cause we are all so different, and I suppose that's the thing; for different people sex means different things.

My home girl Kay (I'm using an alias to protect her identity -_-) has a huge problem. Her new man refuses to eat the sour sop, he doesn't wanna munch on the cookie, he objects to going down on her. Personally I was appalled he was even still her man with those kinda going-ons, but surprisingly she is okay with it, she dosn't LIKE it, but she's prepared to live with it.

Besides finding it difficult to believe that men like that still exist. I remain totally bewildered and perplexed, even in the aftermath of her lengthy explanation of how "some-things-must-be-sacrificed-for-the-greater-good" ... blah blah blah. How could you be okay with mediocre sex??... from anyone?? ... let alone the person you are considering spending the rest of your life with ??? So he's an awesome guy besides that, she insists he treats her like a Disney Princess, just a stand up human being really. The sex, well.... not so awesome, o_O but home girl is willing to tough it out and hope he comes around..... goes down..... or whatever.

I say... good for her, but I wasn't gonna be able to do that. Just like I can't be with a man who does not have the sufficient intellect to hold a decent conversation with me, I cannot be with someone who is sexually incompatible. I love sex, to say the least. My partner must be able to satisfy me (that includes enthusiastic oral sex) and vice versa. If not, we would just be wasting our time. 

I am unwilling to sacrifice my sex life just cause he's a nice guy. I'll wait ..... I'm sure I can find a nice guy eager to give me mustache rides. But seriously, I know you can never have your cake and eat it. That in every relationship compromises have to be made. I certainly know that when looking for a mate common sense wins, the perfect man does not exist, but I will be damned if I stay with a man who doesn't do the cabbage Patch at the thought of licking me like a puppy, with a bowl ah milk. 

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Take me there

My dream is to work hard so I can travel the world. I know I probably wont be able to go to every nook and cranny of the planet so I made a short list of the top 5 places I just absolutely HAVE TO visit before I die (in no particular order). I'll make sure and give yall the other 5 some other time.  






If you could only choose 5 places to visit what would they be?

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Real Love Is Never Ugly

So my home girl sends me a pic of her new man, "what do you think?" she wants to know, "is he ugly?" I laugh out loud at the thought of her feeling like she has to satisfy some social need to have a Star Boi as her man. I thought he was average. She made me assure her that my inconsequential opinion about his nose and jaw line were fact. I was a little annoyed at first, I mean he wasn't a dog, but so what if he was, as long as he was good to her .... right????  

Well it really isn't that simple. We are visual beings, living in an age of instant gratification, in other words we SHALLOW- AS - HELL, and unfortunately looks do matter. No one picks the ugly dude in the dance to make out with, the real question, is how much looks SHOULD matter in choosing a mate.

"I have a type", she explains, "and its not ugly".  O_o Most women know what they want in a man, we always hope that we find him and he's handsome too. But you can't always have what you want. We must be warned against holding out for the "perfect guy". I'm not saying we should lower our standards, just set our priorities straight, and be realistic. She fell for a man who didn't meet her usual strict standards of physical beauty, even though she admits that he a "pretty decent guy" (no pun intended), AND the sex is awesome.

Still, she's concerned about how the kids would turn out, about what her family and friends would think about her bringing home ah ugly man. She feels it necessary to have that general feeling of satisfaction that comes with having a handsome prize on her arm, a man other women would lust for. But really ??? ..... why sacrifice your happiness for a pretty face?? Common sense would tell us that beauty fades, that character and values are what would really decide the faith of a relationship. 

Real love is never ugly.  But hey... if we’re already committing shoe-icide; sacrificing our feet for a hot pair of heels,  its not that hard to see how for some, its totally acceptable to be  miserable as long as he’s cute, but to me that’s like committing suicide.